So greysessed readers, tomorrow is supposed to be the end. As in the real deal, you’re going up or down or maybe somewhere in between. Or so the Mayans have us believing. As I lay here in bed, listening to the rain and gusts of wind, I think about this past year as we come to closing time.
In keeping with the theme of my blog, I am only thinking in Fifty Shades terms. It’s been quite an exciting year for me and I’d like to share some of the highlights. Along with them, I’d like to list all the ways (could there be 50?) that Fifty Shades has changed my world. Perhaps you’ll agree with some of them! As always, love & laters, Michele
~ in March, I got to travel to Seattle with my partner in crime, Kelly
~ kissed/licked/stalked the Escala
~ side note: stayed in LaPush, bonded on the Rez with the Quilieutes !
~ visited the very first Starbucks (big moment for this addict )
~ May 2012, met Ms E L James herself at a book signing.
~ held back the tears as I presented her with Fifty Shades cupcakes.
~ Signed up with Twitter in late spring to try and get Christian Bale cast as Christian Grey. Crashed and burned.
~ on a good note, met the most amazing people who are equally Fifty Shades obsessed.
~ In September, I traveled to NYC with some twitterbesties to attend the Katie Couric show. Got my Fifty Shades cupcakes tweeted by the show. Met Ms. James again!! AND she knew who we were (aka twitter stalkers). Still she had 4 pins saved just for us. “laters baby ”
~ my silly self is now on utube. Fifty shades source interviewed me in the waiting room before the Katie show!
~ got to present Ms James once again with Fifty Shades cupcakes!! (never did get that container back !)
~ Mr Dana Brunetti himself came to pick up cupcakes from little ‘ol me! You know, the producer of Fifty Shades the movie?!?! Yes, amazeBalls !
~ Oh my. How did I almost forget? Started my blog this year! Who knew when I started writing that it would become what it is now! I am so grateful for every reader!
~ next mission: to be cast as the token Asian in the Fifty Shades movie. Hey, a girl can wish right?
Okay, enough about me. How about some random thoughts on how the books have changed society. FYI – these thoughts are completely random. I should be sleeping and instead am writing this in my iPhone. Yes, I said iPhone. So don’t be hating on all my grammar and spelling mistakes.
~ two words: baby boom.
~ we are all proud to channel our inner goddess. Mine sings, dances, and loves kinky Christmas tunes!
~ it’s now both acceptable and cool to talk in BDSM language at the water cooler.
~ Christian, Ana, and Grey are the new “it” baby names.
~ As is Little Blip for your unborn baby.
~ elevators have a whole new meaning. “what is it about elevators?” I know.
~ the sale of silver balls went through the roof of the Red Room of pain. The sex shop I visited said there was a national shortage. National. Wow.
~ speaking of Red Room of Pain, has Home Depot started offering that paint color yet? Alongside the cable ties perhaps?
~ IHOP: serving pancakes and smiles all day long.
~ the purple shift dress is the new LBD.
~ a man who wants you to eat is as hot as him wanting you tied to the bed.
~ kinky fuckery is now part of our everyday language.
~ well, we might as well add Charlie Tango, oh my, and fifty shades of fucked up in there too.
~ oh flogger, spreader bar, and butt plug too. Can’t forget those gems.
~ there is no Brokeback Mountain bromance on twitter between Bret Easton Ellis and Dana Brunetti.
~ watching Target team members under the age of 18 trying to sneak a peek at the books was priceless. Still chuckling over it.
~ when an erotic author stimulates the sale of books in the gazillions, it’s pretty darn cool.
~ and then gets named as one of the “20 Most Fascinating People of 2012”. Damn cool.
~ two words I loathe : mommy porn. Enough said.
~ the books have sparked a Fifty Shades of Grey clothing line. I’m hoping they make a perfume of Christian’s scent. Why should Ana be the one with all the yummy whiffs?
~ hotels in Portland are now offering Fifty Shades inspired packages. Does that come with a free elevator “ride ?”
~ twitchy palms, the new fist bump
~ I’m pretty sure that Ben & Jerry’s saw an odd surge in the sale of their Very Vanilla ice cream.
~ in with the Audi, out with the Volvo. Sorry Edward. There’s a new man in town and he’s putting the kink in kinky.
~ finding out that Ms. James actually called the Audi dealer to ask if sex is possible in their cars made her my hero! I need to grow a set of balls. Or just but some. Silver at that.
I just realized I could go on and on with this list. But I will leave it for now and if we all make it despite the impending apocalypse, I will add to it. Hope you all have a great “this is the end” day. And as they say in that other trilogy, ” May the odds be ever in your favor .”