Welcome back readers! I hope you are here in anticipation of the second leg of the KFC’s first Fifty-themed field trip. And as a side note, trying to blog while your children are hovering and asking, “What is sugar? And what’s pancakes and BACON, WHAT’S THAT ABOUT BACON???” coming from my bacon-obsessed daughter, as I shut the computer faster than Christian Grey can produce a foil packet. Which is why it has taken me all day to try and get this blog up! Is it September yet???
Anyways, our reason for choosing sugar was because of its great reviews, and that it’s lesbian-owned, female friendly and looked very clean. We also heard the sex shops along rt 40 near Baltimore are somewhat shady. And I don’t need to find out what level of shady they are, I have a rep to protect and small children.
So the store is located in the back of some stores off a main street in the lovely town of Hampden, MD. Never been before, but lots of unique stores and restaurants. And apparantly the hometown of the “honfest”, an annual festival that celebrates the working women of Baltimore and making the city what it is today. People come dressed to the nines with their bee hive hairdos and sixties-inspired attire! The word “hon” is a term of endearment to the Bawlmers (local to Baltimore). This festival attracts tons of people from all over and has been in the media from the New York Times to Rachel Ray. Of course I just found this all out while visiting sugar. See I am a Jersey girl, always will be. I’d move back in a second just to not pump my own gas and have a good bagel!!!! But learning about this Baltimore tradition was fun, and I would actually love to see the costumes in person one year. Sounds like a real blast from the past!
Ok, but again getting off the track again…kids will do this since I’ve closed this computer an additional three times since mentioning it the first time. Back to sugar-when I walked in, it truthfully was not what I expected. It was a lot smaller, but not in a bad way. And because its a basement shop, the awesome stone walls just made me feel like we were in a dungeon or castle of sorts. Very cool! And the girl working there was so knowledgeable and helpful. Well, helpful after we all got over the shell-shock of dildos everywhere for the touching. But we warmed up to the store after awhile. And we loved the “Fifty Shades of Grey” books percisely placed near the masks and floggers. The store even offers a Fifty Shades of Sex class. And from what I’ve read, all their classes are fifty shades of yea-you-can-drag-me-to-the-Red-Room-of-pain-and-I’ll-show-YOU-something (as my neck rolls and my finger points with some ‘tude). Oh yes, I am a freak but that’s ok. Kelly and I embrace the freakdom-just wait til I tell you about “THE CHRISTIAN GREY PROJECT”. You’ll be calling Webster’s to get our faces put next to the word freak in the next edition. But that’s all coming soon! Any hoot-next to the floggers and feathers, is a display of different kinds of rope. And we all know what that’s about, right ladies? We did get a giggle from that, envisioning innocent Ana Steele with her pocketknife at Clayton’s. “I’ll take five yards of the natural filament rope, please.” See, this is why living the books is so much fun! It’s like we were at Clayton’s! Only, minus Christian Grey standing there with his beguiling self. Well, close enough:)
So after much touching, massaging, and eyes-wide open at the Black & Decker power of some of these battery- operated treasures, we all make our purchases. And no, I don’t buy and tell…at least until you have all signed an NDA!!! But what I will say is that there is a national shortage of silver balls and the like. Just sayin. All in all, a fun and educational first Fifty’s field trip! I think our next meeting will be a group discussion. If any of you want to be part of it, please let me know. I am thinking we can incorporate out of towners into the discussion somehow. I would love to hear all of your views and opinions on all things Fifty! As always thanks for reading and Laters baby!